Out of the Shadows by Cindy Felkel

Author:Cindy Felkel [Felkel, Cindy]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2021-02-26T05:00:00+00:00

Seen in the Shadows

While I soak in the glow of this evening’s celebration, the joy surrounding me mocks the reality I will return to in the morning. Each happy detail of this dinner party stands in stark contrast to the parties at the castle. Ladies are enjoying their food rather than picking at it with constrained grace. Even the humor has a different tone here. During royal feasts, our hall roars with laughter, but it is not a pleasant sound. It is like listening to an orchestra where every instrument is slightly out of tune. Where the coarse drunken guffaws from men like the Duke and the Marquis dominate the dissonant melody and refined ladies add shrill notes of shallow amusement. Together, they create an awkward tune that is as unnatural as dancing to a funeral dirge. Tonight, the hearty, good-natured conversations chiming through this house sing of belief in something greater.

The roaring chatter calms while the servants serve the meal and guests focus on enjoying their food. Arthur’s fiancé, Catherine, is so consumed with their conversation that she disrupts the quiet with a loud snorting laugh. I turn to her and blush with empathy, prepared to offer a word of encouragement. But she continues unbothered by her outburst. She even makes a joke of it by holding a napkin over her face for a second, before poking Arthur and blaming him for her snort.

“You almost made me spew wine out of my nose!” She giggles.

Catherine’s parents are too caught up in listening to Mimi’s stories to notice. I scan the crowd. There are no horrified gasps. No delicate ladies fanning themselves. No old men shaking their heads. Nobody noticed at all. I’m the only person still struggling to put on a show. Flora is even relaxing at a table as she fields questions from curious nobles.

Yet, I sit tense with anxiety, waiting for permission to relax, seeking to soak in the joy of everyone else, wishing I could forget the expectations that come with my title and allow myself to enjoy this dinner.

Arthur notices my stiffness and snickers. “I never thought I’d see my god-sister sitting so rigidly and eating with such elegance.” He draws Catherine into the conversation. “You’d never believe how adventurous she was as a girl. And how quickly she ate. Mom used to worry that she was going to choke, she ate so fast.”

I laugh. “Yeah! Because when you were around, I wouldn’t get anything if I didn’t hurry. My heavens, you could wolf down your food.” I pick up my knife and point it at Arthur as if I’m using it to guard my food from him, “And Catherine, let me warn you, keep an eye on your plate, especially if there’s any bread pudding on it.”

She pats Arthur’s shoulder. “Trust me, Aristella, I learned that the hard way. I guard all my desserts from this one.”

As I nod to her, I give Arthur a playful scowl. “Why, I’m quite certain if it were just us, we’d have to be guarding these dishes right now.

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